This one goes out to a very special planet...

"Earth (my favorite planet)" by woodleywonderworks

Earth! What's up! It's your day!

Yesterday, not so much. Sorry about that, but it's hard to aim for a garbage can when I'm speeding down the freeway in my Hummer. Especially since I can't roll down the windows and waste the air-conditioning that I have to blast! to the max! since it's getting hotter and hotter every year. Ha ha, global warming.

Anyway, I promise not to throw my styrofoam out the window, or my cigarettes, or the gasoline tanks that take up precious room in my awesome Hummer. Today is about you! It's the day to recycle! Even toilet paper! Literally, the sky's the limit, according to chemists. No hairspray in an aerosol can for me!

Actually, I figured out that while my carbon footprint is over twice the average in the world, for an American, I'm doing pretty good! My carbon emissions level is half the level of the average American, in fact! Find out yours, and what you can do to lower it, by using the Carbon Footprint Calculator.